Kurt Wilhelm Grasinger and Donald Joseph Lutt are to be married Nov. 20 at the Manhattan Penthouse, an event space in New York. Madeline M. Pantaleo, a friend of the couple who became a minister of American Marriage Ministries for the occasion, is to officiate.

Mr. Grasinger (left), 45, is the senior legal operations manager in Washington for Marsh & McLennan Companies, the New York insurance and financial services concern. He graduated with high distinction from the University of California, Berkeley, and received a law degree from Vanderbilt.

He is a son of Rolanda M. D. Grasinger of Williamsburg, Va., and Dr. John E. Grasinger of Corrales, N.M. Mr. Grasinger is a stepson of Dr. Patricia A. Pade.

Mr. Lutt, 51, is a senior director in Washington for CBRE, a commercial real estate firm. He runs the firm’s consulting group for Washington, Baltimore and Northern Virginia. He graduated cum laude from the State University at Albany and received an M.B.A. from N.Y.U.

He is a son of Roslyn Rosenberg Lutt and Irwin Lutt of Glen Cove, N.Y.

The couple met 16 years ago to the day of the wedding when Mr. Grasinger sent Mr. Lutt a drink at Splash, a bar that was in New York.